


Memory Foam

by acedavestrider



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Ascension, God Tier (Homestuck), M/M, Not Epilogue Compliant, Post-Canon, tenderness...........
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-10
Updated: 2020-07-10
Packaged: 2021-03-04 21:00:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,047
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25192822
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/acedavestrider/pseuds/acedavestrider
Summary: Karkat ascends to god tier.
Relationships: Dave Strider/Karkat Vantas
Comments: 11
Kudos: 114





	Memory Foam

**Author's Note:**

> request from a friend on tumblr!

Dying doesn’t have to be uncomfortable. This is something you’ve had to learn the hard way, in just the couple decades that you’ve been alive and through all the times you’ve been very briefly dead. Nothing has to be uncomfortable if you don’t want it to be, and in fact you’re convinced that your life’s purpose is to make everything you do as goddamn comfortable as physically possible. Why do anything if you’re not luxuriating decadently at all times? Why change out of your Adidas Adissage Slides™ with the Footbed Massage Nubs™ if none of your other shoes have even comparative levels of cushiony relaxation? Why wear any clothes besides your implausibly soft and velvety god tier pajamas if everything else will just irritate your sensitive skin and leave you dissatisfied? As far as you’re concerned, you don’t really see a point in doing much of anything if it’s not going to be done with maximum amounts of hedonistic indulgence at all times. 

Dying is included in this manifesto of yours, which is why - 

“You’ve gotta get the memory foam, babe,” you tell Karkat. He looks at you with the crumpled expression and hazy eyes of someone who loves you dearly but can’t be bothered to listen to another word out of your mouth. “I know you’ve got back problems, I’ve felt those knots in your shoulders, this mattress is gonna take care of all that shit okay, nevermind the layer of cooling gel so you won’t get all sweaty and gross like you tend to do-” 

“If you don’t stop talking I’m going to die right here in this human sleeping platform repository and it won’t fucking matter which pliable slab you pick out for me to expire on,” he interrupts. “I will dramatically collapse onto the floor and turn to dust because the sheer force of the stupidity of everything you just said to me will have collapsed my molecules into tiny black holes that’ll pull me apart with enough violent power to destroy paradox space itself. You’ll never get to see me in my stupid fluffy asshole pajamas or have the chance to make fun of me when I hurt myself trying to learn how to fly. And it’ll be your fault, Dave.” 

You blink. “So you want the memory foam, then?” 

“Yeah.” 

“Dope.” 

You flag down the friendly carapacian store owner and let him know which mattress you want, at which point he bounces on it happily to demonstrate the high comfort levels of the item. It ends up costing some amount of made-up money that you don’t care about, and you toss a wad of cash at the guy with the same cavalier and nonchalant body language that a millionaire might have when showering erotic dancers in one dollar bills. You assist in bringing the large mattress over to the transportalizer, and it disappears with a green flash of light in an instant, sent away to Rose’s house where she’ll adapt it for god tier shit accordingly. You have no idea how she’s been managing to modify regular beds into quest beds, it has something to do with blah blah game mechanics and something something Skaian influence, but it’s been working, if Kanaya’s sick new outfit is anything to go by. 

“Alright, babe,” you address Karkat with an excited clap of you hands. “You ready to make like a baby and head out?” 

He grimaces at your phrase, having recently been educated on the nature of human birth, to an unfortunate degree of detail. “I guess so,” he mutters. 

“If we take our time Rose’ll probably be done with your bed when we get there,” you continue, leading the way out of the store. “Are you fucking psyched or what? Ready to bear the downy accoutrements of a whole ass god? How about being virtually immortal, that’ll be pretty cool, right? You won’t have to worry about freak accidents anymore, you know, next time you trip and fall down the stairs your whole life won’t flash before your eyes-”

“ _Yes_ , Dave, I am fucking thrilled,” he says in a tone that is decidedly not thrilled. “I definitely wanted to spend my day getting violently murdered on top of a squishy human sleeping board with the hope that doing so will grant me magic powers and shroud me in goofy loungewear for the rest of eternity.” 

You squint at him and put your arm around his shoulders to stop him from drifting away from you as you walk towards Rose’s place. “You feelin’ some type of way about going god tier?” you ask. “You sound like your panties have bunched right up into your asshole and are starting to chafe like crazy.” 

“I just…” He sighs and finally makes the effort to look you in the eyes. You can just barely see tears gathering around his bottom lashes. “What if it doesn’t work?” 

You frown. “Why wouldn’t it work?” you ask. “Kanaya seems to be pretty fucking immortal already, like have you seen her sweet cape thing? It’s way cooler than mine, and that’s saying something.” 

“Of course it worked for Kanaya,” he mumbles. “I just don’t think it’ll work for _me_.” 

When you give him a patient expression he continues, “I’m not sure if you’ve noticed, but things just categorically do not work out for me. If anyone could fuck up the simple action of dying in a specific place, it’d be me. My luck is so cosmically and hilariously bad that I’d probably end up dying the regular, boring way and not ascending at all, just bleeding profusely all over the confusingly expensive plush platform you just bought. That would be so fucking typical and I-”

“Hey man,” you cut in. “Thing aren’t like that anymore.” 

“What the hell makes you say that?” 

“I mean like, we’re not in the game anymore, you know?” you point out. You use your free hand to gesture loosely as you speak, if only because you never feel like your words are sufficient enough on their own. “You’re not on Alternia anymore, either. There’s no dumb rules to play by and no huge ass monster douchebag coming to kill us. The bad luck you used to have has been left squarely in the dimension we just peaced out of, it’s floatin’ around in paradox space trying to make someone’s life a living hell but it can’t fucking find you, dude. This new place has changed shit for you, okay, you’ve been having crazy good luck lately.” 

Karkat’s mouth purses. “Like what?” 

“I mean, you’ve got me,” you say with a grin. “That took way too long but I’d say that’s pretty good luck, considering I’m incredibly handsome and a delight to be around.” 

“If that’s what you want to call it…” Said with a smile, pink on his cheeks. 

“And all your friends are alive and out of danger, that’s pretty cool,” you continue. “Kinda weird having Gamzee around again, not gonna lie, but he seems chill at least. And Sollux showed up a while back, too, I know you missed him and everything-”

“I missed him in the same way you miss a pubic itch when it’s gone-”

“Yeah, exactly,” you agree. “And not to mention the sweet job you landed the other month, and how many times you find spare change in the couch during the week, and how we somehow managed to get your favorite soap opera channel on the cable box even though we definitely didn’t pay for it-”

“Okay, Christ, I get it,” he says with a hand up to make you stop. “You’ll just have to excuse me for assuming things will go horribly wrong when I spent my whole life having exactly that happen over and over again.” 

You pull him closer to you and give him a reassuring squeeze. “It’ll be fine,” you say. “I promise.” And that’s really all there is to say on the matter. 

You spend the rest of your walk in relative silence, and Karkat only starts to shake in your arms when you approach Rose’s front door. She greets you with the same manic kind of excitement she always gets from fucking with Skaia’s bullshit rules, and she brings you around to her backyard where Karkat’s extremely soft and downy quest bed has been set up in the grass, Kanaya waiting nearby. When you inquire why the bed is outside, Rose gives you a wide smile and reminds you that ‘ascending to god tier’ is both metaphorical and literal in meaning. 

She explains how the process works with an expert tone, but you’re only half listening, more focused on holding Karkat’s hand. She’s tried to make things as painless as possible, and has managed to alchemize some kind of extremely deadly poison that she’ll administer to Karkat to kill him as effectively and gently as she can. The idea alone makes your stomach churn uncomfortably, but you guess you’d rather have him get injected with whatever lethal shit Rose has made instead of getting stabbed or blowing up inside a giant bomb. She reassures you both that everything will work out fine, using Kanaya as a shining example, and then gives you a minute to yourselves to think things over. 

You take both of Karkat’s hands in yours and make him look at you. He’s trembling more than you’d like. “You gonna be okay?” 

“I don’t know, Dave, I’ve never fucking died before,” he snaps. He sounds like he’s about to have a full-blown panic attack so you rub your thumbs on the back of his hands to try and calm him down. 

“Rose said it’ll be completely painless and she generally knows her shit when it comes to this stuff,” you reassure him. “And Kanaya will be right there to hang out with you, and I’ll be here on the sidelines making sure no assassins are coming out of the shadows to get you or whatever. It’ll be fine, okay?” 

He looks up at you, red tears pooling in his eyes, and gives you a determined nod. “Okay.” 

“Good.” You smile. “Now put on your big boy pants and go die like a man.” 

He rolls his eyes but smiles despite himself, receiving the kiss you give him with equal parts fear and determination. You give him a playful pat on the ass as he walks towards the quest bed, which has developed a deep shade of brown since you bought it, and he swats at your hand with little effort. It’s only when he situates himself on the mattress and starts talking to Rose that you feel yourself getting nervous. 

Your hands start to sweat by the time Rose produces a syringe of clear, apparently extremely deadly liquid and approaches Karkat with it. This is when you decide to sit down on the grass some ways from the action, the prospect of watching your boyfriend die making you feel dizzy all of a sudden. You don’t watch when Rose administers the drug, instead choosing to focus on Kanaya and how calm she is, the way she runs her fingers through Karkat’s hair with the adoration of a mother comforting her child. Rose steps away after a moment with an empty syringe, Karkat’s eyes begin to close and then… nothing. 

Your heart stutters when nothing immediately happens. How long does it take for someone to die? How long until the universe determines that they’re going to ascend? Karkat’s fears of things going wrong hit you all at once, and you start to feel panic well up inside your throat as you worry that maybe you just saw him die, for real, permanently. 

And then Kanaya jumps away from Karkat’s still body as if she’d been burned, and he starts to glow with enough intensity that it makes you squint behind your sunglasses. You stand up in awe and alarm as Karkat’s limp form rises into the air, deep amber light emanating from all around him, so bright that you can hardly see him anymore. You expect to hear something - fanfare, a chorus of angels, a triumphant, blazing score - but all your ears can pick out is the crackling of static electricity and the thumping of your own heart. 

Karkat continues his ascent for what feels like forever, rising into the sky far enough that you worry he’ll hit the sun, until the light bursts out of him with a sudden, overwhelming flare and he begins to drift back to the quest bed, shrouded in the brown garments of his god tier. When you finally take your eyes away from Karkat’s peaceful, beautiful form, settled comfortably back onto the bed, you notice Kanaya crying nearby, and the moisture on your own cheeks. 

It takes a moment for Karkat to reawaken upon landing back on his bed, but he does so eventually with a gasp, sitting straight up as if from a nightmare. Kanaya and Rose approach him immediately, Rose to check for injury and run his vitals, and Kanaya to pull him towards her in a deep embrace. They all exchange words but you don’t hear any of them, too distracted by the ringing in your ears and the heat in your face to focus on anything but Karkat. You see Rose give Karkat an encouraging push in your direction, and he approaches you with a shy sort of hesitance, like he’s not sure how you’ll receive him. 

When he finally makes it up to you, heat still radiating from his body like a collapsing star, he gives you a nervous smile and presses a comforting hand into your side. You take a moment to look at him properly, to soak in the radiance of his presence, the warmth of his skin, and the bright, brilliant crimson that’s found its way into his irises. 

“You did it,” you say. 

“Yeah,” Karkat agrees with a laugh like he doesn’t quite believe it. He wipes a residual tear from the corner of his eye. “I did.” 

You put your hands on his hips and hold him at arm’s length to make a point of checking him over. “And you looked damn good doing it,” you half joke. “These new god tier digs really bring out your best assets, if you know what I mean. Coulda sworn I was seeing Ryan Gosling himself fall outta the sky like an angel straight out of hot dude heaven-”

You cut yourself off when Karkat covers his face suddenly and lets out an unexpected sob. It startles you a bit, and your instinct to pull him flush against you is delayed by a few moments, though he crumples into your arms nonetheless. 

“Hey, it’s alright,” you mumble into his hair. He feels so small against you. “Look, you fucking _did it_ , okay? No bad luck or fucked up fluke or anything, you looked mortality in the face and told it to get fucked, just like you’ve been doing your whole goddamn life. And no one’s gonna try and take it away from you, not the Condesce or the game or any of the wack ass people you had to deal with on Alternia. This shit’s yours and you get to keep it.” 

You think you feel him nod, and you just hold him for a while as he cries. Rose and Kanaya make their quiet exits to give you some privacy, and Karkat clutches onto the hem of your shirt like he’s afraid he’ll drift away otherwise. You repeat yourself a few times, tell him again that he doesn’t have to fear for his life anymore, that no one will cull him for his blood or his beliefs or his sexuality, and throw in a few teasing reminders that he’s stuck with you forever now, and that he made this choice knowingly, which means he can’t blame you when he ultimately decides you’ve annoyed him one too many times - 

“Okay, okay,” he mutters, pulling away from you with a poorly disguised sniffle. “I get it.” 

“You alright?” you ask again, tone shifting away from teasing. 

“I’m fine,” he says. He wipes away the last of his tears and looks at them on his fingers in disdain. “Leave it to me to make a huge scene about a thing that literally every one of my friends has already managed to do without being massive wigglers about it.” 

You shrug. “Yeah, well, you’ve kinda got a reason, I feel like,” you point out. “Like… everything I’ve been saying for the last five minutes?” 

“I guess.” He sighs and looks at you with wet eyes. “Thanks, though, for…” 

“Don’t mention it.” You pass him a gentle kiss in lieu of speaking anymore, and he accepts it gratefully. An idea pops into your head then, and you grin at him, anxious to make him feel something other than dread and panic. “Hey, you know what’ll be fun?” 

“Going home and forgetting how much of an ass I just made out of myself?” he supplies. “Yes, Dave, what a perfect, nonthreatening suggestion, let’s do that-”

“Nah, I was thinking of something else-”

“Sweet Christ-”

“How ‘bout we take your new flying powers for a spin?” you say, getting more excited by the second. You tighten your hold on his waist and his eyes double in size. 

“Do _not_ -”

“Alright, please keep your hands and feet inside the vehicle at all times,” you announce. “We will begin our ascent in three… two…” 

“ _Dave._ ” 

“One!” 

Karkat lets out an unceremonious yell as you launch the two of you into the sky, and his long nails scrape against your sides, clinging to your shirt. You laugh and do a couple rolls before starting to loosen your grip on Karkat, just to let him get a feel for the sensation on his own. The fear in his eyes quickly turns to elation when he realizes that he can float of his own volition and he performs a few experimental stunts, to your absolute delight. When he falters a bit and seems to loose his balance, you tug him towards you to kiss him again, and revel in the fact that you’ll get to do this every day, as much as you want, for the rest of eternity. 

**Author's Note:**

> this was actually very fun to write and i owe my life to the lovely person who requested it! also no epilogue compliance this is my canon now
> 
> thanks for reading! leave a comment if youd like <3


End file.
